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Posts Tagged ‘confidence’

Building Confidence was the topic of a seminar I delivered last week.  I thought it would be great to share some of the thoughts and comments that the audience shared during the seminar:

When I asked what Confidence sounds like they shared:

  • a strong and clear voice
  • stating ideas without second guessing yourself
  • speaking up – having a voice
When I asked what Confidence looks like they shared:
  • eye contact
  • a smile
  • standing tall and straight
When I asked what Confidence is like inside our heads/thoughts they shared:
  • focused
  • positive self talk (not the absence of negative self talk, that’s still there sometimes)
  • listening to others
Confidence is having trust and faith in yourself and others.  Confidence is having the courage to take a risk when there is a goal you are reaching for.
I left the audience with a final question:
What if you were to act AS IF you are confident in every situation?  
  • Acting ‘as if’ means you are choosing to sound confident by the words you are choosing and how you are speaking (out loud and to yourself)
  • Acting ‘as if’ means choosing to look confident by smiling and paying attention to how you carry yourself in the world
What are your thoughts on building confidence?
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Several years ago I was completing some exercises as I was embarking on career and life exploration of my own.  One of exercises asked me to write my 20 year vision.  My first reaction?  20 years?? At the time I found it easy to plan my weeks and months, even loosely knowing what I wanted to accomplish that year, but the next 20??

After a brief challenge of wrapping my head around the concept that I could plan that far ahead, I began to imagine what I wanted my life to be like 5 years from then, 10 years, 15 – and I was able to get to 20.  So I sat at the table on my deck and began to write, letting my imagination run free, thinking about my big goals and dreams – especially those that had lain dormant for a while.

It was fun, soon the ideas began to flow so much so that a giddiness took over.  Could this really happen – I asked myself?  Why not I answered.  And that marked the beginning of my life and career transformation.

Now it’s your turn.  Whether you want to focus on 1 year, 5, 10 or 20 – begin to let your imagination run free – remember the dreams of your childhood, uncover those you never dared dream and create a realm of possibility currently beyond your imagination.  Then take it to paper, letting all your thoughts form words and images.

Your vision for the future is limited only by your imagination!

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Starting my business was a key turning point in my own  journey from comfort to possibility.

Being employed by a university was my comfort zone and it served me well for many years.  But I found myself being curious about what else was out there – in a new place, a new career.  Starting my own business was not something I had ever thought about before.  It was way out of my comfort zone to not have a steady predictable income but my curiosity soon turned to excitement once I learned more about what possibilities existed for me. 

Was there fear?  Absolutely!  So I started learning just enough to start, but not too much to get me overwhelmed.  I stayed focused on one (or three) steps at a time, not looking at the next 100.  As I completed steps, I added some new ones, all the while keeping the journey exciting, challenging, but manageable. 

This tactic kept me focused and on track whenever I questioned “what am I doing”!?  And believe me there were plenty of those moments especially that first year.

The beauty of my business journey is that it is ongoing.  Yes I am always looking a few steps ahead but very much enjoying the day to day as well as the process as it unfolds.

Where are you on your journey?

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One side of me that I am very passionate about is working with my hands.  There is something very zenlike about diving hands-first into a project that gets me dirty – and using different parts of my brain (and body) than I use in my work as a coach.

Home remodeling/organizing projects are what I love most.   You may have heard me talk about gardening and painting  (both artistically and the rooms in my home) but the past couple of weeks I finally learned how to use power tools!

My husband and I reorganized our garage and in doing so, I learned to use a miter saw, table saw and drill press.  All tools I have watched him use for years, but never tried.  I’ve always helped him with projects, but this time I took greater ownership of doing some of the pieces of the project myself – very empowering and fun!  I know have greater confidence in my abilities and can now tackle more projects on my own.

What have you always wanted to try?  Are you ready to dive in?

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Last week I attended one of Cheryl McArdle’s creativity classes.  This one was about color.

Now many of you know I’ve been painting on and off for many years, but color, specifically the mixing of it, has always felt more confusing than it actually is.  That is what I learned in Cheryl’s class. 

This class also inspired me to paint.  You see, though it is something I love, I often go for weeks without painting – if I’m busy with other more pressing things, if I’m not sure what to paint, if I don’t have a reason to paint…

By simplifying a process that I thought more complicated than it was, I now am more confident and excited about the possibilites that await me with this new information!

What processes do you beleive are confusing or complicated?  They may be just as simple when you learn the right technique, or just hear the technique shared in a way that finally has the light bulb go off in your head!

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“There is no act that is too small to make a difference”  I heard this statement in a commercial talking about making change in your community and the world.  It also relates very well when you are moving through a transition in your life or undergoing any personal or professional growth.

All transitions happen one step at a time.  Some steps are so small we barely feel like we have taken them, others are (or feel like) giant leaps but each one counts!  

Small acts within a transition can be a phone call that broadens your knowledge, a chance meeting that opens your eyes, a moment or experience that develops your confidence.  Each of these small acts build upon each other and have tremendous impact on your growth.

What small acts will you take today on your path of personal or professional growth?

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In the movie Yes Man with Jim Carrey – he starts out as a “No Man”, saying no to every request, opportunity and offer from his boss, his clients (he is a loan officer so it’s easy to say no) and his friends.  

I was suprised by how much I saw myself in this character.  Though I don’t always say no I find myself wanting to, especially when I overschedule my days….

As the title implies, Jim Carrey soon becomes a Yes Man, this time saying yes to every opportunity and question that comes his way, nomatter who or where it comes from…and he truly begins experiencing his life like never before.

When we say Yes to opportunity, expecially opportunity that looks, sounds or feels very different than our norm, it opens up a part of ourselves and brings an aliveness to our existence. 

Can we truly say yes to everything, nomatter what it is?  That’s not the idea.  The idea is to consider saying Yes to what initially may seem uncomfortable or different, especially if it may bring us closer to our vision for what we want in life.  What we are saying is Yes to life!

What would you like to say Yes to?

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